


Not Goodbye

by JamesSunderlandsPillow



Category: The Loud House (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, Comfort, F/M, Romance, read the summary dude
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-11-05 14:55:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17920979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JamesSunderlandsPillow/pseuds/JamesSunderlandsPillow
Summary: Lori’s last day at the Loud house is bittersweet for Lynn Jr. She hates to watch her oldest sister leave, but she can’t help but feel good about the person growing closer to her. (I do not own The Loud House.)





	Not Goodbye

**Author's Note:**

> For NickTheIrkenArtist.

**Not Goodbye**

**Lori’s last day at the Loud house is bittersweet for Lynn Jr. She hates to watch her oldest sister leave, but she can’t help but feel good about the person growing closer to her. (I do not own The Loud House.)**

**For NickTheIrkenArtist.**

The Loud house, daylight.

It is abnormally quiet in the 1216 Franklin Avenue home today. There’s the exception of Luna Loud strumming along to the chords of _Wish You Were Here,_ and the shuffling of furniture and cardboard boxes full of shoes, cargo shorts, and framed pictures of friends and family out of the oldest Loud girls’ room.

It had to happen someday, but today is that day. Lori’s last day as a resident of the Loud house.

Her scholarship to Fairway University proved to be a one way to ticket to bigger and better things, but it comes at the price of leaving behind the home she was raised in. For her, there were weeks, months, _years_ to prepare for this day. Time spent picking and choosing classes for a business administration major. Time spent having long talks with her BFF Carol Pingrey about fulfilling childhood dreams. Time spent babysitting the neighborhood children, or just her youngest siblings, and thinking of a future where she’ll have kids of her own, hopefully with Roberto Santiago.

For Lori, this was a lifetime of achievements all leading to her biggest milestone leap into the world of adulthood, the true turning point in not only her life, but in the lives of all the Loud family.

For Lynn… It isn’t so easy to pretend it doesn’t hurt.

Being her lively, go-getter self, she took it upon herself to help Lori with most of the heavy lifting. That’s why she’s been carting boxes back and forth from the bedroom to the U-Haul outside all morning, disregarding physical fatigue, ignoring the fact that everyone is so quiet, imagining the idea that this is all going to be good for Lori, for Leni, for everyone in the family.

She does it for the same reason sharks don’t stop moving. She just has to keep moving.

It gets to the point where the count of things to take out of Lori’s room is diminishing, but there are still a few heavier boxes that she could afford to move out.

“Oh wow, I can’t imagine what you’ve got in this one,” she jokes to her oldest sister regarding a box of _even more_ shoes.

And while the resident jock meets her with a sly little smile, Lori isn’t able to muster the enthusiasm to return one of her own. Instead, she looks down to the carpet with a somber wince, and rubs her arm.

“Hey, Lynn… I appreciate all of your help,” she starts. “But I think I can get the rest of these on my own.”

Hearing her say those words breaks down any adrenaline Lynn had coursing through her. She was happy to help! She’s a walking trophy! What, is she not doing a good enough job? Is she worrying her over being too rough with her dumb shoes? Is she… is she just trying to be alone?

No matter what it is, two things stay in her mind’s eye for the lasting minutes ahead. One is the look on Lori’s face. The saddest, most listless she’s probably ever seen her. Yeah, there was talk of excitement and being ready to have Bobby all to herself in a one-bedroom apartment in the city (that was fun watching them explain that to Dad). But now? Now she can’t fool anyone. Not even if this was Luan on April Fool’s. The image of her melancholy sadness burns itself into Lynn’s mind, burrowing deep and refusing to leave.

The second thing that sticks with Lynn: this would be her last memory of Lori here. The two of them quietly working boxes out into a cruddy truck, hardly engaging in any conversation, trying to ignore the other siblings staring at them with pouting puppy dog eyes. All while secretly pining for some laughter, or something to make them appreciate the sentimentality of these last few moments together before Lori takes off in her proverbial pumpkin carriage.

Instead, she’s being told not to worry. Being told she doesn’t need to help. This apparently isn’t a team sport anymore. It’s a solo act.

For a moment, all Lynn can do is watch and stare at her golden haired sister with a dropping jaw and a sinking heart. This… this is real. It’s really happening. In a matter of moments, she’ll be out the door, leaving for future days.

But… this is her day. As hard as it is for fourteen year old Lynn Loud Jr, it has to be exponentially tougher for Lori. She realizes this, she knows it deep down.

So, even if it hurts. Even if it brings her the biggest feeling of failure she’s _ever_ felt over her life of winning and being the best, she’ll swallow the bitter pill. She’ll do that much for Lori.

She fixes herself, and offers Lori a weary nod of affirmation before simply telling her, “Okay.”

It isn’t as easy to actually make her way past her, catching a familiar whiff of her signature perfume as she lethargically bee-lines to the door. She can’t help herself, she has to glance back.

Lori does too, shifting her glossy blue eyes in her direction. A very weak smile briefly curves on her lips before she turns back around, choosing to give some stupid shoes her attention instead of her own sister.

 _“That… that isn’t fair…”_ Lynn reminds herself. And she knows this to be true. Lori isn’t in any hurry to leave the house, she’s just steadily moving forward like people are supposed to do.

But it still sucks. It still just… sucks.

Lynn won’t cry though. That’s one thing she won’t do. Instead, she bucks up, taking a deep breath before finally leaving the doorway and making her way to her own bedroom.

Two boys happen to be making their way through a door of their own at this very moment, the dynamic duo known around Royal Woods Middle School as Clincoln McCloud. For the duration of today, Lincoln had been doing what he could to help Lori with her move. Offering a hand to move things out of the attic, keeping the twins occupied by drawing with them, comforting Lynn Sr when he started crying… And he had his best friend Clyde McBride at his side the whole way through. That much was to be expected after all. Clyde was just good like that.

He didn’t have to come over today to help out. He could have easily stayed home and watched some Invader Zim or messed around on Twitter to try and block out the sad reality. But that isn’t what friends do. And Clyde knows that.

So, he but on his big boy pants and kept strong today, being sure to help Lincoln with everything that weighed on his weary head with everything going on. It wasn’t the most fun he’d ever had, no. Aside from getting Lana to laugh about potatoes and Wumbology during the tea party with Lola, there hadn’t been much amusement today.

And with the way Lynn Jr dejectedly makes her way into her bedroom, Clyde can see that trend possibly continuing.

Which makes this that much worse… Ever since the day she helped he and Lincoln become noticed during middle school orientation, he’d seen her in a much different light. She wasn’t just some rough neck with an affinity for sports and calling his buddy fun names like Stinkoln and Booger Brain. No, she was someone who didn’t just want herself to succeed, but the whole team. Everyone on her side that she cared about.

And that day, she proved that Clyde was someone in that camp. And while he wasn’t a fan of camping, he was more than happy to consider Lynn something more than just a mutual peer of Lincoln’s. No, maybe in the right light, they could even be considered friends.

“Clyde?” Lincoln says to him to break his reverie, and the bespectacled boy shakes himself to grant Lincoln his attention.

“Huh?”

“Did you hear me?” Lincoln asks, apparently having said something.

Clyde blinks a few times before getting his head back into the game (Heh, Lynn probably liked that phrase).

“Uhm, sorry, I actually didn’t,” he tells him with modesty and honesty.

It makes Lincoln sigh a tired sigh that would make Lucy proud. “I said I think I’m going to go check on Lynn. She looks like she could use a pep talk,” he explains, the exhaustion in his voice evident.

He weakly steps forward, putting a comforting hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Sorry if I haven’t been the best company today, Clyde. You’re too good for us,” he tells him before deciding to reluctantly press on.

It’s almost as if time slows down around for young Clyde McBride though, and some dramatic music begins blaring in the background as he’s given a small window to make a life changing decision.

Okay, maybe not life changing, but this was still pretty important, he thinks.

_“Maybe I should… No. No, don’t impose Clyde. You’re here to support Lincoln and his decisions.”_

_“But what if that doesn’t really help? What if I’m just enabling him by not stopping him and telling him to take a break?”_

_“What would Dr. Lopez say?”_

_“Wait… She said something about how I should try thinking for myself more… But, then she tells me she’s a professional? Agh! Why am I so bad with conflict?!”_

As he continues spiraling, Lincoln continues trudging his way to Lynn’s door. In a matter of seconds, it will be too late. He’ll be making his way in, and with everything going on making the two of them so tense, they could end up crying!

 _“Lincoln crying? Oh man… I don’t know if I can handle that!”_ Clyde realizes.

But that’s only half the bombshell. It’s the other conclusion he draws that really punches him in the gut.

_“Lynn… crying…”_

Suddenly, he feels something he’s seldom felt before. A surge of fight response smothering and snuffing the feeling to flee he’d typically feel in a moment such as this.

Forget Dr. Lopez for a little while. He knows what he has to do.

“Lincoln!” he practically cries, raising his right hand almost as if to try and rewind time by a few seconds.

Lincoln turns his tired eyes to the other boy, offering him the chance to say what he needs to say without any stubbornness.

And for once, Clyde decides it’s worth taking advantage of as he perks up, and makes his way over to the white haired denizen.

“Don’t trouble yourself,” he asserts, returning Lincoln’s previous gesture by placing his own hand on his shoulder now. “You need to take some time to decompress. Today’s been really stressful for you. Relax for a little bit. Let me go check up on Lynn,” he suggests.

Lincoln contemplates his recommendation for a moment. “No, I appreciate the offer, Clyde. But she’s my sister. I just gotta,” he rebuts.

And while normal circumstances would see the only McBride son concede and take a step back, this wind howling like a swirling storm inside won’t let him do anything except push forward.

“You do enough, though. You’ve been selfless all day,” he argues. “Please, let me try and have a word with her. You just go take a minute to yourself. Today isn’t just about Lori, you know? It’s about all of you guys.”

Lincoln ponders this with a thoughtful finger pressing against his chin. Soon enough, an almost enlightened expression comes to him as he nods with approval. “Okay. Okay… Maybe you’re right,” he agrees, maybe with some relenting. However, a reassuring smile comes to his face. “Thanks Clyde.”

Clyde smiles back as he removes his hand from Lincoln’s person. They share a mutual gaze of trust for a moment longer before Lincoln starts pacing back towards his room, leaving him to brace himself for the task ahead.

“Alright. Well, here goes nothing,” he comments as he takes a breath to calm his nerves a little before braving ahead.

It starts with a hand hovering over the doorknob, but he realizes he should probably knock. It’s only polite, after all. He raps his dark, smooth knuckles against the hardwood with the rhythm of _Do You Want To Build A Snowman._ “Hey, Lynn. It’s- It’s Clyde,” he stammers.

He didn’t realize just how fast his heart was racing until now, but with the silence that follows, he’s able to come to some actualization regarding his own reality. Here he is, asking for entry into a _girl’s_ room, so he can try and make her feel better. It was far from his norm, and just thinking of it that way makes him realize just how intimidating the prospect is.

No, it’s not a case of _What’s the worst that could happen?_ Because the worst that could happen is, he could say the wrong things. He could step on a landmine that sets her off in the wrong way, the one that triggers her to explode after a day of reserving pent up frustration and sorrow over the situation. It could go badly. _Really_ badly if he isn’t careful.

But this is Lynn. And for some reason, he feels like he can trust her enough to just _talk_ to her. The same way he could when asking her for advice on how to survive gym class, or even the time she encouraged him to let her help him with his baseball throws.

It’s that thought that gives him some confidence to stand and stay while a storm rages on, waiting for a response from the other side of this daunting door.

…

Just as he begins to feel like maybe this was all a big, awkward mistake, he hears her faintly say, “Yeah?”

Dang, he almost feels the need to wipe his brow. That in itself was a relief. But the battle is far from over. He’s merely straddled toes on the borderline. Now he must take the next step into the hyperbolic time chamber to begin the true test of mettle.

And it starts with one simple question.

“Can I come in?”

Again, her response is belated, calculated. But it comes soon enough. “Yeah,” she responds with the same word, but with a new science of understanding behind it.

Similarly, Clyde thinks to himself, _“Here goes nothing”_ once again as he takes the initiative to actually put his hand to the doorknob, and carefully twist it…

He considerately peeks only his head inside, and he sees her sitting upright on the edge of her bed.

Her normal shine isn’t there. The eager energy that radiates from her seems to have burnt out, almost as if to contrast with the light from a golden sky bleeding into the bedroom from the blinds covering the windows.

This was new for Clyde. Normally, Lynn was somewhat of an intimidating presence. She didn’t mean to be, she was just naturally unshakeable. Something about her made her the loudest person in the room no matter where she want, even when she had nothing to say. It was scary for a few years, but with time, he came to admire this about her. Heck, he even hoped she would rub off on him in some ways.

Now? Now she almost seems like a broken down… shadow of a girl. She’s vulnerable. And while it does bring a swelling pain to Clyde’s heart, he also can’t help but find himself in awe at her.

From every angle, from every perspective, good or bad… She really is just a girl.

And a very pretty one, at that.

It’s hard enough to control his heart rate just seeing her hang her head lowly with the blend of the room’s chiaroscuro and her auburn bangs covering her brown eyes, but when she tilts up to face him with an almost listless look, he almost freezes.

Only almost though. Breathing exercises with Dr. Lopez conditioned him to find greater control in such situations.

Lynn would probably meet him with some incredulousness under more common circumstances, or probably jump out of bed and blurt something out about going and doing something to put some muscle on his arms. Not now though. There’s a small glimmer of what seems to be curiosity in her irises, but they’re the only exception. Everything else about her seems… broken.

The twelve year old boy takes a moment to consider whether or not she may have anything to say about his sudden arrival, but from the looks of things, she seems to be doing the same. So again, he’ll take some initiative.

It starts with him swallowing some of the spit he’s choking up on, but he’s able to persevere soon enough. “Hey Lynn. Uh, what’s up?” he asks, trying not to show how apprehensive he really is.

He’d hoped it would prove more fruitful than asking _“How are things?”_ considering he already knows the answer, but the girl seems rather unimpressed by his question. Not enough to get angry or excitable, but enough to wince and fold her arms with a shrug.

“You see it,” she simply responds. Her eyes meet his for a moment longer to retain the reciprocity, but she soon fixes her eyes back down to her bedsheets, choosing to find better company in the vagueness of nothing special over the almost guilty soul of Clyde McBride, a boy who is very real.

 _“Dang it, that probably wasn’t the best way to open up,”_ Clyde thinks to himself. _“But then again, I don’t suppose there really is any good way to start this conversation.”_

With that in mind, he takes yet another moment to consider his options. It probably isn’t the best idea to just spazzingly ask about her feelings and why she’s sad like some sort of jerk. He isn’t like those kids in South Park.

No, he’s much more considerate than that. There has to be something to show her this. There has to be some way to open up the gates and show her he can be trusted.

He finds it.

On the nearby dresser, there are some nearby mementos on display from both Lynn and Lucy's’ careers as a sportsman and poet respectively. Almost as if intentionally hidden behind some trophies for trek and a vase full of (dead) roses gifted from one Mr. Sunderland, there’s a candid picture of Lori Loud and Lynn Jr framed and recently dusted. It shows the smaller girl hoisted on Lori’s shoulders, both of them smiling proudly over the fact that Lynn won a junior league mini golf tournament with the rest of the family happily cheering on.

A smile stretches on Clyde’s face as he reaches over to carefully grab the picture frame only by its corner, just enough to get a better look at it. There’s a good reason Lori was his first (and now former) crush. She was a very dependable, highly shrewd, greatly respectable young woman who was able to not only bring out the best in others, but also inspire just by being herself.

While the nosebleeds and robot noises got old with age and maturity, one thing remained unchanged, and that’s that Clyde could understand why people loved her so much.

It also reminds him just why the Loud family members feel so sad today, especially the girl on the bed a short distance away from him.

He sighs as he places the picture back in its original position, and he looks back to her to see her still staring down onto her bed with folded eyes and a shamefully cute pouting lip. Well, it’s cute for a moment, but only until he realizes just how true the trepidation is for her.

Something changes for him seeing that. His urge to keep from saying what he means from the heart wanes, and without overthinking things, he decides to just say them.

“I’m sorry things are tough right now,” he begins, earning him Lynn’s undivided attention. She still relents from getting excitable, instead choosing to keep composure as Clyde composes his thoughts. “I don’t know that this really matters coming from me. I know we haven’t talked very much, but… I do think really highly of you.”

Lynn studies him with almost interrogating glances, but whatever small bubbles of concern brewing inside of him die down as she scoffs a small, amused little scoff.

“Gee Clyde. You here to ask me to steak dinner or something?” she jokes.

He can only offer her a nervous little laugh in response, and while a small grin encroaches on Lynn’s face for a moment longer, it soon gives way to more of the same, somber blank space that lingered there before.

She’s quiet for a few seconds. Long enough to decide she doesn’t need to be defensive. An olive branch has been extended, and while she may not be so willing to accept one from just anyone, she’s okay meeting Clyde McBride in the middle.

She starts with a little sigh. “Thanks,” she says in return to his kind words. There’s a shimmer of contemplation on her part afterwards, but it doesn't amount to anything more as she chooses to just leave it at that.

And for Clyde, that’s okay. He wasn’t expecting much else. Truth be told, he wasn’t expecting anything, really. This was about lending a helping hand to a girl in need, not gratification.

And with that in mind, he decides he’s crossed into a new territory of trust. Maybe he can raise the bar a little further.

He steps a little closer to her, almost enough to hover over her place on the bed, but not enough to make her uncomfortable. It will be okay where he is for a little while.

It’s a question he couldn’t have asked with a straight face before, but now, he’s content with confidence, and asks away. “Are you gonna be okay?”

A simple question, yes. But the answer could be exponentially more meaningful if she let it. And he’s aware of that. He welcomes it.

Again, there’s some doubt on Lynn’s behalf as she thinks of how to react, but with the second reminder that this is someone worth investing some trust in as opposed to any nosy, finger pointing rando at school, she comes to a conclusion. One that gives her the courage to speak with transparency.

“Yeah… Yeah I think things will be okay,” she answers. She almost wants to leave it at that, somewhat hoping not to bother him anymore with her concerns. But there’s a stronger desire to just… say something more. “I mean, I won’t lie, I feel pretty crummy about this whole thing, especially since I barely have time to Lori as is… But it’s whatever. She’ll still come around. I’ll get over it. I guess.”

Her gaze drifts with the last few words, again averting Clyde’s dark eyes for the small things. In this case, it’s a stray string on her shorts that she chooses to twiddle. A nice welcome distraction from the gravity of reality.

 _“Heh, Dr. Lopez must be rubbing off on me,”_ Clyde mentally quips for himself as he picks up Lynn’s cues. She may not even realize it, but he was right in coming here. Right now, more than anything, it seems she could use a friend.

And if there’s one thing Clyde prides himself on, it is trying to be the best friend to others he can be.

He braves a little forward, deciding to sink in a deep breath before slowly making his way to Lynn’s side on the bed. She feels his weight dip down on the mattress, and while it comes as somewhat of a surprise, she takes comfort in his familiar musky scent. The boy cleaned up nice.

So, fine. She’ll let him sit here too. But not close enough to make things weird, of course.

He eyes her just a little from the corner of his eye before sucking in another big breath. “Can I tell you something?” he asks her to break the ice once again, and to hopefully segway into something possibly more helpful than the usually heard condolences.

She weakly shrugs, the day clearly having gotten to her at this hour. “Yeah. Go ahead.”

He takes a moment to prepare, hoping for the best. “Okay. Well, would you like to hear why I got over my crush on Lori?”

She meets him with a little more enthusiasm as she raises a brow at his question. “Alright, sure.”

Again, he has to brace himself, but it proves to be easier than he anticipated as his breaths become easier to manage. Somehow, being closer to Lynn here now makes all of this easier than when he stood at her doorway.

“So… I guess at some point, I just realized Lori wasn’t ever going to return my feelings for her.”

Lynn amusedly scoffs again. “Pffft. Yeah.” She sees the way some of the air is deflated from him with the playful jab, and she quickly finds remorse. “Sorry, sorry… You were saying?”

He easily disregards her remark as he continues with his explanation. “I mean, not only is she happy with Bobby, but, I mean, I’m just a kid,” he says with a weak little laugh. “She has her whole life ahead of her pretty much all planned out at this point. She knows who she wants to be and what she wants to do. She’s really got a driving ambition.”

He looks away from the girl now.

“I guess what I’m trying to get at is… Lori’s got to do what’s best for her. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t care, it’s just what she has to do. You understand what I’m trying to say?”

Lynn digests what she’s been told, letting out a sigh as she lets herself fall back on the bed.

“Yeah, yeah, I understand Clyde.”

She takes a moment to find the words she wants to say to him with the help of a blank ceiling, and then lets them come to her.

“I don’t know. I know this is just the way things have to be. I know I’ll get over this feeling. We all will eventually. I’ve lost enough qualifying matches to know that much…” She looks to him now, and he looks back to her. It just seems natural now, kind of like turning away when they needed to. “It just stinks now is all.”

They fall into silence, allowing their thoughts to take form for a short while. For Clyde, it’s almost hard not to have the right thing to say. If only he could be more like his fathers, or Dr. Lopez, and just know the right things to say all the time. Heck, even Lynn had proven to be pretty good at pep talks.

But for him, despite the realization that they’ve crossed this new threshold, he now feels twinges of guilt for not being able to say the _perfect_ thing.

Even so, he won’t let it deter him. He’ll stay here for her as long as she wants him to.

Lynn though, she finds focus in another thought.

“You know what’s bothering me the most right now?” she begins, and Clyde simply listens as she elaborates. “I can’t really remember the last time I had like, a _moment_ with Lori. Like, just the two of us. I know she has a lot going on, and there are eleven of us, but still…”

“What do you mean by a _moment?”_ Clyde softly asks.

Lynn meets him from the corners of her eyes again before turning her head to the wall.

“It’s stupid.”

Clyde raises a brow, feeling his chest swell with a familiar fusion of anxiety and dread. “It’s not stupid,” he tries to tell her, but she shakes her head as she sits back up, folding her arms over her knees while donning a grimace.

“Yes it is. I know it is. It’s stupid and it’s selfish,” Lynn persists.

He wants to tell her she isn’t being fair to herself. He wants to argue that she should feel free to speak her mind without so much hesitation. Instead, he just stays silent, internally praying she’ll open up to him.

In a strangely serendipitous sort of way, he gets his wish, but at the price of _again_ failing to think of the right things to say to her.

“You see that picture on my dresser? The one where she has me on her shoulders?” Lynn starts, pointing out the snapshot she unknowingly fails to realize Clyde has seen.

He keeps that to himself though, only replying to her with “Uh, yeah. Yeah, I kind of see it behind the dead flowers.”

“They were a gift from some weird writing teacher Lucy won a contest for. Luna really hates him,” Lynn explains. “But that’s not the point. The point is… I don’t think I ever really felt like I was as close to Lori as I was having her help me with that tournament…”

Sullenly, she lowers her head into her arms with her next thought.

“Honestly? Sometimes I feel like a stranger in my own house… I mean, I know we all love each other, and sometimes I can get Lana or Lincoln or Luna to play a game with me or something… But it’s not often I get anybody to myself around here. Well, except for Lucy,” she trails off with a little smile as she looks to the girl’s gothic amenities.

It’s short lived as she frowns once again. “I’m sorry Clyde. I don’t mean to bum you out with all this sad talk. I guess bunking with Spooky has taken a little bit of a toll on me…”

This was definitely a new experience for Clyde. He was often the one telling another person his feelings and thoughts regarding the troubles of a middle schooler’s life, but now he’s on the other side of the couch, hearing out Lynn of all people.

She never let herself get this way. Problems could be worked through with hard work, determination, and occasionally punching bags. This time though, her only resort is to work through her emotions like this. She knows it, Clyde knows it.

He also knows that she’s capable of doing so.

An almost distant memory comes to his mind, and he can’t help but welcome the little smile on his face that accompanies it. He’s a little hesitant to share his thought with the sporty girl, but if there was ever a time to try something new, it would be now.

“Hey Lynn?”

She looks to him from the corner of her eye. “Yeah?”

“Do you remember the first time I came over to visit?” he asks, making an effort to look to her.

She thinks hard to take her mind back to that fateful day, allowing the images of a five year old Clyde first entering the Loud house to return to her.

And she too smiles.

“Heh, yeah. Yeah, I remember your first time coming here,” she says with some amusement.

Clyde takes pride in seeing that she remembers it fondly as well. “Yeah. I remember being so scared and nervous that Lincoln had so many sisters. And I remember coming here, trying to play with him, and then Lori and Luan started fighting because she made fun of her awkward stage,” he says with a little huff. Some of his euphoria is drained from him as he recalls what happened next though. “So Lincoln tries to get them to stop fighting, and then Leni started crying, and then Luna decided it was a really good time to start blaring your dad’s Cowbell Christmas album-”

“Which just made her cry more,” Lynn finishes for him, and they share a soft laugh at that before Clyde wraps up his story.

“All I could do was watch, feeling like a total boob for not being able to help or do anything. And, I wondered if maybe coming here was just a mistake.”

He fixes his eyes on her now. It’s easy to take comfort in her charming freckled face now the same way it was then with the memory of their experience that day.

And she looks back to him, her heart warming with the same sentimentality.

“But then you come into the room, and instead of getting involved in everyone else’s bickering, you come up to me, and you said-”

“Hey kid… Wanna play some hacky sack?” she belatedly says.

And for a moment, they take pause as they gaze into each other’s eyes. There was just something wonderful and exciting about finding something new that day. And, in a way that’s all too similar yet somehow completely different, there’s something great about the synergy they share in this moment. They’ve exchanged a new kind of trust, one that they didn’t just feel for the first time together, but maybe for the first time… ever.

The smile on Clyde’s face grows wider as he sees the way Lynn’s cheeks pinken just a little, the same way he realizes his probably are too. But, even with these saccharine feelings, he has just one more thing to say.

“That’s when I knew you were a great sister, Lynn. That’s when I knew you were just… someone that could be trusted. Someone I could look up to,” he admits.

And it’s at this point, he has to look away from her again. It’s just too embarrassing to keep gawking at her with such sickeningly sweet happiness.

She doesn’t look away just yet though. She smiles at him for just a moment longer before turning to face forward too, milking the nostalgia and reassurance for just a little more.

“I mean, I’ll be honest. I don’t see what this has to do with Lori leaving. But I’ll also be honest and say that, whatever you’re doing right now… It’s working, Clyde.”

His endorphins start to get the better of him as he weakly turns to look at her again. And, oh gosh, when he sees the way she warmly looks at him with a sense of compassion he’s never seen from her, or any girl really… He feels his heart skip a beat.

Especially when it registers for him just how… beautiful she is. Her eyes, her hair, her pretty little freckles. Gosh, she really is something else. And it scares the heck out of him to think that maybe, just maybe, she might be feeling some of these strange things too.

It’s also exciting.

But then, something changes in the way she looks at him. Where there seemed to be something sure and convinced, there is now something questionable. Her eyes narrow a little, her head tilts a bit, and her smile wanes ever so slightly.

“Hey, uh, don’t get me wrong. I really appreciate you coming to talk to me and all,” she starts. She then looks back to the floor for a moment, her smile having disappeared all together now as her eyelids lower like shades pulled down tight. “But why did you come?”

Like so many other things about today, it isn’t an easy question to contemplate.

Is it really as simple as explaining to her that he wanted to do a favor for Lincoln? Or that he wanted to be here for the family on their stressful day?

Seeing this girl in this light the way he does now, he isn't so sure. And it doesn’t get any easier when she looks back up to him with those glossy brown eyes of hers, the ones that almost bore into his very soul with every word she offers.

There's a moment of epiphany for him as he realizes just what he's feeling. It's confusing, frightening, and fills him to the brim with hope all at once, but it makes it so much more strenuous to just give her a reasonable answer without any sort of dramaturgy.

He decides to tell her this.

“Well, Lynn… I just wanted to be sure you're okay. It's the least I can do.”

That's what he tells her, but he knows and is disappointed with himself that he couldn't say more. Because he gets what's happening, he trusts it in his core that what he's really feeling is real.

The same feeling he got when he realized he liked Lori.

But, as important as it is to come to terms with it, and to work on figuring out how this might change things later, he decides it's more important to make sure Lynn will be okay.

Upon hearing his answer, she lightly nods. He can see the thoughtfulness on her face as they stay quiet for a second longer, thinking to himself that, maybe it was the best thing he could have said after all. She can accept that he was concerned, and maybe if she even has more to say, he'll listen. If not, that's okay too.

The signal he gets next tells a different tale though. Before she even says it, a surge of the same conflicting anxious feelings tremor into his heart with the realization that she might just see right through him.

“Is that… the only reason?”

Frozen. The boy becomes actually frozen upon hearing that.

Does she know what he's thinking? Does she see that he's secretly hoping to make more of this already fantastic talk? Heck, could she even be feeling the same way?

What started as a venting session about Lori now feels like a heart to heart with a best friend, someone he could do this with everyday if he needed to. What else is there to Lynn he can help her with? What other secrets and bonds could they share? He isn't even sure he can do that, for reasons that terrify him beyond just being his best friend's older sister.

But, then he finds the comfort of her eyes again. In them, all of these amazing possibilities don't seem so far out of reach. Was she willing to do the same? Did she consider these things too?

He doesn't know, and he's almost too afraid to ask.

But only _almost._

The way she looks to him, the way she asked that question, he decides to embrace the mentality of what a fool believes. Maybe it's a mistake, maybe he's misreading her.

But he likes to think that, if she were in his shoes, she would take the chance to seize the moment.

…

But before he can do anything about this emotionally charged mutual gaze that they share, there's a sudden gentle knocking on her bedroom door. It breaks them of the nebulous, practically making Lynn jump from being startled before she responds to the perpetrator with, “Come in.”

Part of Clyde I'd relieved, part of him is disappointed. But all of him is sure that, sometime soon, he'll have to tell her the truth.

Until then, they look to the door to see Rita Loud barely creeping her head in, her eyes watery and red with obvious sadness.

“It's time, Lynn.”

Her daughter can't even find words as the reality kicks in. She just stares at her until she makes her way back out into the hall, not even closing the door behind her.

Clyde feels his chest tightness with remorse as he watches Lynn try to digest the truth. She just stares at the door with her jaw dropped for a moment longer before putting on the most melancholy face he's ever seen from her.

It was time to go and face the day again, but there was no being ready for it. There was no preparing for the thing to unfold.

And while that thought hurts Clyde a whole heck of a lot, he won't turn and run. Lynn didn't back down when she thought he and Lincoln would be pulverized by middle schoolers that one fateful day, and Blarney be darned if he would turn away from her now.

So, he takes the initiative once more, slowly making his way off the bed to stand so he can take a deep breath. He idles for a moment before looking to Lynn with somberness in his gait, and he asks her the hardest question he's ever had to ask anyone.

“Are you ready?”

From the way her face quivers, he knows the answer is no. He knows that, if she could, she would try her absolute hardest to somehow stop the clocks and make time stand still for as long as she needs to to hang onto the way things are for just a while longer.

But she can't.

So, she'll do what she knows deep down that she has to do. She'll stand up, join Clyde in heading downstairs to get with the others, all so she can bid farewell to her oldest sister and the life they live now.

No, it isn't easy. But love never is.

She nods and after what seems like minutes, she finally looks to Clyde's eyes once more.

“Ready when you are.”

\-----------------------

The warm summer sky shines its golden red hue over the stratosphere of Royal Woods as the Louds all gather out to the front lawn of their home. All thirteen of them wear the same crestfallen faces as they do everything they can to internally prepare for what has to be said and done, but no amount of thought put into the situation makes it any less painful. This is the last time all thirteen of them can say they'll live under one roof, one whole family all living together and spending every day as loud and united as possible.

It hurts Bobby Santiago too, the young man working on locking up the U-Haul truck he rented just for this occasion. He gets the door shut and sealed for their upcoming trip to the city, and then turns to face his girlfriend.

She doesn't look back to him. Instead, she keeps her eyes glued on the wall of the home where eleven multi colored handprints are stained.

This is the house built her. And while it won't be going anywhere, and she can always come back to visit… it breaks her heart to think that her mornings will be quieter. The footsteps that pitter patter all around will keep doing just that, even with her gone.

It's for the best, and she knows it. Life is all about creating new moments and enjoying the memories you have, and that's not possible when you stand still.

She just didn't realize how hard it would be to walk away until now, moving her eyes from the handprints on the wall to the twelve other people who helped paint then as they file out of her childhood home.

Clyde and Bobby stay surly silent as they allow the Louds to have their intimate moment, starting with Lori stepping forward to approach them, trying as hard as she can to find the fact that tears are welling up in her eyes.

So many faces, but for her, a number can't be placed on how much they mean to her. Nothing can quantify the meaning they bring her life, each and every single one of them, together or alone.

Even so, she owes them all something in this time of struggle, and she'll give them all something to remember her by before being sent on her way.

She starts with Leni, her roommate, her best friend since she was born. They force smiles and they look to one another, doing the best they can to save face and not break down crying like they did when Tristin was killed in VoM.

“So, I guess you'll have your own room now,” Lori says to her, trying to make light of the situation.

Leni actually chuckles at that. “I guess…” What amusement she got soon fades though. “I couldn't ask for a better roomie though.”

Lori nods at that. “Same here Leni.” She then rests her hands on her shoulders, looking deep into her eyes to show her just how much these words mean to her as she speaks them. “It's up to you now to be the big sister around here. You gotta help Mom and Dad anyway you can. They'll all need it, and I know you can handle it.”

It becomes too much to keep the tears from falling for Leni, and some of then escape her as she sniffles. “I'll try,” she simply says.

“I know. And you'll succeed,” Lori assures her before breaking away from her to move on to her second sister.

Compared to her brother and sisters, Luna is able to maintain a certain wind of composure to her through it all. Sure, her eyes make it obvious she feels the pain of everyone, but she also knows in her heart that they’ll all float on alright.

She meets Lori with a soft smile, and her oldest sister returns the gesture. “You’re gonna keep this place nice and loud, right?” she asks.

“Don’t stop believin’,” Luna simply answers.

They know nothing more needs to be said. Lori trusts her to be the voice of reason, to be the mature one now. And Luna knows that, while Lori will be fine on her own, she can always send her a call or text just to check in, or to maybe even ask for a hand when she needs somebody to lean on.

And Lori knows she can do the same.

She moves on to Luan, who wears a frown on her face unlike she’s ever seen. Normally, the fourth oldest Loud is the one to never mind the darkness, to bring smiles and laughter in even the toughest of times. But right here, right now? Lori can see that even a clown needs to cry sometimes.

She isn’t so sure what to say, or if there’s really even anything she can do to change the way things are. But she knows one thing for sure, and that’s that her sister can’t resist a joke, even in the worst of times.

“Hey Luan?”

She sniffles, trying to muster words through her crying. “W-What?”

“Why can’t your nose be twelve inches long?”

She smiles despite the tears. She already knows the answer, but dang… it feels really good to hear Lori ask her that.

“Why not?”

Lori smiles back. “Because then it would be a foot.”

They share a little laugh because of that, and it makes it easier to get serious again.

“I love you, Luan,” Lori tells her now.

“I love you too, Lori,” she responds with another sniffle. “But don’t think that you’re getting off the hook on April Fool’s just because you won’t be living here.”

She laughs a little. “I’ll be counting on it,” she answers, and with that, she makes it to the next sister in the line-up.

As expected, Lucy is her usual stoic self. She understands the gravity of this situation, even with the knowledge that time is a construct and past lives bleed into the next, but it’s still a bit of surprise to even her when she feels a single tear roll down her cheek upon facing her oldest sibling.

Lori smiles at her as she brushes the hair from her eyes so that she can see them for herself for once. They’re so beautiful, a reminder of just what she loves about a girl like Lucy.

“I’ll be sure to keep up with Vo- _Vampires of Melancholia_ even when I’m gone. And maybe I can even swing by to catch an episode with you every once in a while.”

Belatedly, quietly, Lucy says to her, “I’d like that.”

She likes it too when Lori uses just her finger to cup her chin, a gesture to let her know to keep her gloomy spirit high no matter what. They’ve said all they need to say, and so Lori moves on to the twins.

Where she was able to meet the others with reassuring smiles, it becomes impossible when she sees their puffy, watery red eyes.

She can’t even think of anything else to say. She just gets down on her knees as she wraps them both in her arms, squeezing them tightly as they hug her back.

“I love you guys. Take good care of each other, okay?”

“Yes, Lori,” Lola and Lana both say at the same time.

She breaks the hug, taking turns looking into both of their eyes. She’s now able to meet them with loving smiles just as she did the others, and elicits them to do the same as she kisses Lola’s forehead and ruffles Lana’s hair from under her hat.

The next sibling in the line is Lisa. As expected, she seems rather calm and collected. Sure, her posture and dejected eyebrows show signs of sadness, but she’s already done the math and wondered her way through the odds. This just has to happen, and she’s done everything she can do humanly possible to brace for it.

It makes Lori proud to once again see her only five year old sister handling things so well, and she’ll be sure to let her know that as she stands tall looking down to her, granting her the adult’s respect she’s worked very hard for.

“So Lisa, I guess this is goodbye.”

The prodigy fixes her glasses with her finger, possibly to cover up some sniffling of her own. “Erroneous, eldest sibling. This is not goodbye,” she corrects her. “I’d prefer to view it as the embarking into a new chapter of our lives. One that I’m confident you of all people will be able to reap the benefits from. I’d certainly hope so, anyway. I can’t think of anyone more deserving.”

Hearing those words brings a warm sense of encouragement to Lori’s heart. She almost can’t even think of a way to meet her words of wisdom with the response they deserve, but it doesn’t stop her from trying anyway.

“You’re the best, Lisa. You really are,” she decides to tell her.

She isn’t surprised to see Lisa take further initiative though, because she isn’t one to stray from getting the last word when she knows it’s tactful enough. This time, Lori lets her have it.

“As the kids say… no, you.”

They smile at that, and Lori moves on to her very youngest sibling.

It’s amazing for her to realize that they girl is now two years old, capable of forming some sentences, capable of realizing just what some of the emotions she feels really are. Even more amazing is the thought that, while she’s away, this girl will still get to experience the very best things about getting to have a childhood in this home of all places. While it saddens her because she’ll have to miss some of it, it makes her more happy to know that she’ll get the best family imaginable to give her the best life imaginable.

She gets down on one knee, meeting her little, teary eyes. Unlike the twins and Luan, her depression is something more contained. Something maybe she’s never felt before, something maybe she isn’t even so sure she can fully comprehend at her age. She knows she’s sad though, and Lori can see it well enough.

And while she wants to smile at her the way she did the others, this is what breaks her heart the most. She can’t hold back the pain anymore. She has to let the tears out.

She places her hand to Lily’s face, tenderly rubbing her cheek with her thumb as she stares into her baby blue eyes.

“I’m sorry Lily. I’m so sorry,” she tells her. She’s forced to take pause as the crying gets overwhelming, but she’s able to fix herself enough to look back to her and elaborate. “I wish I could stay here forever and just watch you grow up into the wonderful woman I know you’ll be, but I just can’t. I just can’t…”

She hangs her head low, really feeling the waterworks get to her now. Her family watches on, all of them experiencing the weight of the sight before them. Nothing encapsulates just what all of this really means quite like watching her break down before the littlest Loud, and while some of them don’t cry… they know they will before tonight is over.

For a short while, Lily only watches on as the woman in front of her, the ones who’s changed her diaper and gave her a bottle more than anyone else in this family, bawls her eyes out, apparently ashamed of something. It’s hard for the little girl to really understand why, but she knows that, what’s really important, at least for her, is that Lori is sad. And she doesn’t want her to be sad.

She gets sad sometimes too. And when she does, she likes it when someone tries to cheer her up. So, she decides to do that for her. Just like she’s done countless times before.

“Cheer up baby, don’t you cry,” she begins to sing. “No more tears it’s cheer up time...”

Lori controls herself enough to slowly raise her head and look back up to the toddler. It’s almost unbelievable, but once she sees her lips moving, she realizes it’s actually happening. Lily is singing to her, trying to make her feel better. It’s the most wonderful gesture she’s ever seen from another human being, all while being excruciatingly painful. How could such a magical, beautiful thing happen for her? What did she do to deserve her?

She has to actually laugh a little, because it’s just so unreal. She just stares into her eyes, hanging onto every word she sings. And Lily just continues like it’s her job to do this. Like it’s her duty to be the best sister she can be to her, the way Lori has always done for her and everyone else.

“Laugh with me and we will be…”

Lori can’t help herself. She decides to join her in singing the last verse.

“Happy, happy, happy…”

It’s as if all of time and space are at a standstill just for the occupants of 1216 Franklin Avenue as the little girl finishes her song. Bobby, Clyde, and the Louds can only watch her and Lori with a sense of desperation as the little one offers her sister a little smile.

“Better?” she simply asks.

Lori really doesn’t want to cry anymore, but she can’t control herself as more and more tears run down her cheeks. Somewhere in the infinite melancholy sadness, she got lucky enough to listen to Lily sing for her, and despite all of the miserable feelings that come with leaving her nest, nothing will ever take away the magical moment she was blessed with just now.

She wipes away some of her tears, putting on the best smile she can for little Lily.

“Yeah. Better,” she answers.

For a moment, they just smile at one another, and then Lori stands to catch her breath. She still has four more people to say goodbye to, five including Clyde.

So she bucks up and puts on her big girl panties, getting prepared to speak to her only brother.

They try smiling at each other at first as she greets him with, “Hey little bro.” It doesn’t last though as they both realize what they need to do next.

They’d never admit it, but there was something that made Lori and Lincoln bond in a way that none of the other Louds siblings could. While the other siblings had dreams and aspirations that seemed to define their own unique little worlds, these two could connect over the mentality that they weren’t the stars of the show. They were members of a family that had many moving parts, parts that all needed maintenance and care. It’s not to say they didn’t focus on their own needs and wants. It’s untrue to say that the others weren’t capable of making the time to stop tea parties or séances to check up on a sister or Lincoln.

But everyone knew the one thing they just wouldn’t, and really didn’t need to say. Lori and Lincoln were the glue that kept the family together. They just were.

Now? That would fall on Lincoln. He’d have a one man job whole Lori gets to retire off into a sunset.

It makes it that much harder for Clyde, Lynn, and everyone else watching when they see Lori start to cry again.

Before she can even say anything though, Lincoln takes it upon himself to say what’s on his mind.   
“I’m really going to miss you, Lori.” His words escape him for a moment as he chokes up, but he’s able to summon his Lincoln luck to find strength and push through. “I know you aren’t leaving forever. And I know I can go to the others when I need them…”

His eyes start to water as he tightly clenches his fists, fighting to keep his resolve. He fails though. He just fails.

“But I need you…”

By now, he can’t keep the tears back anymore, just like Lori. Just like the woman who helped make him the boy he is, the woman who really made this family into what it is.

In a strange sort of way, she expected him to be the one who would comfort her now. He just always knew the right things to say. It’s hard for her to believe he’s only twelve years old sometimes.

But in this moment, she remembers he isn’t Superman. She remembers she isn’t anyone special either. They’re just a brother and sister in a family as big as theirs, two people who just try and be there for the people they love when they’re needed.

And like he stated…

Lori makes her way closer to him, kneeling down to his level to wrap him into her embrace. They both hold on tightly to one another, squeezing hard with all the love they can muster before slowly ebbing away.

She looks to her brother’s eyes, sniffling and wiping a tear from her own before she finds the words she wants to say to him. It’s tough, just like everything else she’s had to do leading to this moment. But Pop Pop likes to say: when the going gets tough, the tough get going.

So, she does what she’s been taught to do as a big sister, putting aside her own feelings of pain to help her brother.

“Lincoln, listen to me,” she begins, staying firm, but speaking calmly and soothingly. “You’re right. I’m not going away forever. You couldn’t make me even if you tried,” she adds with a little smirk before getting serious again. “But I need you to be strong, okay? You have to keep doing what you do to keep everyone around here smiling and happy. The same way you always do.”

“But what if I can’t? What if I need your help?” he asks through his tears.

Lori reassuringly smiles at him as she places her hands on his arms. “You can always get a hold of me, Lincoln. I might be busier now with college, but I’ll be there for you. I’ll always be there for you.”

She takes this opportunity to look to the others now, feeling what she has to say is important to everyone.

“That goes for all of you. It doesn’t matter if I’m here or on the other side of the earth, I’ll never stop loving you guys… This… this will always be my home.”

For a moment, they’re quiet as they let her words linger in the evening air. Some of them still cry, like Luan and Leni. And some of them concede to crying, like Luna and Lynn Sr.

As for his namesake daughter…

“What about me?” she asks, deciding to put aside and all tough girl pretense for the sake of showing her oldest sister how much she cares.

It surprises them all. Clyde, Lincoln, Lori…

“Of course, Lynn,” she says as she turns her attention to the brunette.

With every step she takes in her direction, Lynn feels more guilt and despondence. She shouldn’t have said anything. She could have just kept quiet and waited to see if Lori would come her way, but she couldn’t. Not when she feels like this might be her only chance to just tell her without any fear how she really feels.

She feels selfish. She feels stupid. This was supposed to be Lori’s moment…

But Lori doesn’t fret. Not at all. In fact, she almost seems like _she’s_ the guilty one with the way she approaches Lynn and stands before her like she did with Lincoln.

“Lynn… I’m sorry. I know I could have done better today with you guys. I could have tried making more time for you…”

Hearing that just makes Lynn feel worse, and she makes the effort to speak up again, “Lori, please don’t-“ before being shot down.

“Let me finish Lynn. Please…”

She takes a deep breath as she finds her place again.

“I don’t have any excuses. I just… I hope you all know that I love you. I love you guys so much,” she says as she glances at each and every sibling, finishing with Lynn. “And yes, Lynn. That definitely includes you.”

All the girl can do is meet her older sister with the same piteous expression as she lets those words register in her mind. She knows they’re true. She knows it was dumb to think otherwise. And yet, she still can’t help but feel ashamed for questioning it. Especially now that she’ll be leaving so soon…

It doesn’t seem to matter much as Lori perks back up though, making her way back over to the U-Haul with a newfound vigor in her step. “In fact, hang on. I have something to show you,” she says to her before facing her boyfriend. “Bobby, can you open up the truck?”

He deflates. “Oh babe… It took me like, twenty minutes to figure out how to lock it up,” he complains.

“Bobby!” she sternly repeats, snapping him out of his momentary stupor.

“Okay, okay. I’ll get it!” he assures her, making his way over to the lock and keying it open to reveal all the contents inside the back of truck.

The rest of the denizens all watch with curiosity as Lori frantically scurries her way through boxes, uttering out curses as she digs to find just what she’s looking for. “Aha! Here we go!” she calls out as she seemingly finds whatever it is.

She climbs back down with a box in her hands, and sets it on the ground to start rummaging through it.

The crummy feelings Clyde has seeing Lynn so distraught gradually dissipate as Lori pulls something out of the box, something that makes Lynn’s eyes widen with pleasant surprise.

“Remember this?” Lori asks her sister as she shows to her a very familiar framed photograph. One just like the one Lynn has framed for display on her dresser of mementos, the same picture of these two girls celebrating a victory of a certain junior league golf tournament.

Lynn’s heart starts to flutter as she realizes what Lori’s trying to do, and she fumbles over her words as she tries to say something about it. “What- why- Yeah. Yeah, that’s one of my favorite pictures,” she tells her.

Lori smiles at that. “Yeah, it’s one of my favorites too,” she admits as she looks down to it, cherishing the image of their shared happiness before looking back to her sister. “It reminds me that, even with so many people all living under one roof, we can all make some time for just each other. Two of us, three of us, all of us… I couldn’t ask for a better family…”

The smile disappears from her face again, as she’s forced to shed another tear with all the overbearing emotions swelling inside.

“I just… I’m sorry that I can’t be around as much anymore.”

Seeing that his girlfriend is getting flustered again, Bobby goes to her to wrap his arms around her for comfort. She welcomes it, putting her free arm around his waist as well.

With the momentary silence, there’s time for Lynn to come to an understanding. Even with everything going on in Lori’s rocky adult life, she still takes time to look back at old family photos such as the one in her grasp just to wander back to memories of good times. Times that happened so frequently that, for every one picture, there were exponentially more laughs. Unforgettable moments like the one happening now, the ones that defined the Loud family as a unit and as individuals.

She was right. She can be in another city, state, country, or planet, and she’ll still have Lynn and the rest of her family in her thoughts. That’s nothing to question anymore.

As for Clyde McBride, there’s a strange sensation that comes with being the spectator. He knows he hasn’t been forgotten, but he also knows he isn’t the priority. And that’s perfectly fine. He knows if this were the other way around, and he were in one of his neighbors’ shoes, that they would all show the same support for him. He’s glad to be here for Lincoln, Lori… Lynn…

The whole thing had been heartwarming. Hearing little Lily’s song, watching his best friend hug his sister, even witnessing Lucy’s tear… It was all worth the price of admission.

But, in his heart, he doesn’t have to afraid of a truth he’ll keep quiet. He doesn’t have to warn others with any disclaimers or asterisks. He’s fine keeping this feeling to himself for now, maybe even forever if it’s for the best.

Seeing Lynn display so much raw emotion today, he knows now what he really feels for her.

For every Loud and friend, there’s a storm inside. And Lincoln is certainly no exception. He steps forward to his oldest sister, ready to return the comforting words she was able to offer him.

“You have nothing to be sorry for though,” he says to her.

She breaks away from Bobby to look upon him, and they all grant him their undivided attention as he tells them her he has to say.

“Lori… We all just want the best for you. You deserve it. You’ve been such a great sister to us. Such a great friend…” he begins. “If it weren’t for you, who knows where we’d all be. You helped me really come out of my shell with Ronnie Anne. I owe our friendship to you. And every time I need a ride to the comic book store, you stop what you’re doing to take me there. You even let me pick what stations to listen to on the way.”

“Yeah, and you got me into Boys Who Cry,” Luna interjects. “Not to mention helping me out with Carol here and there…” she trails off, blushing towards the end.

“And you’re the best at head scratchies,” Lola adds, which Lana agrees to with a nod.

“I would have never joined theater club if it wasn’t for you. No joke,” Luan reminds her.

“I must admit, most older siblings would not be willing to discuss the socio economic status of the country while also making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, but you’ve proven to be a superb companion,” Lisa stresses.

And the train keeps rolling as even Lucy joins in with her two cents. “You stood up for me when I finally told everyone I like Princess Pony. I’ll never forget that.”

Lori feels her heart swelling up even more as more tears of joy stream from her eyes. “You guys,” she can only say.

But what really gets her is the last three siblings, and what they have to say to her.

“You’re my best friend,” Leni vehemently states.

“You’re just the best sister,” Lynn sums up for all of them.

And like magic or some sort of chemistry, they all turn to face Lily.

“You’re really nice,” she comments, earning her affectionate laughter from everyone around.

Lori looks to all of them once more, finally fixing her eyes back on her brother Lincoln, the one to start it all. He smiles at her, ready to deliver one more blow to show her just how much she’s loved and cared for.

“Lori, you’re not perfect. Sometimes you yell, and sometimes you steal my charger thinking I won’t notice. But you know what? You make up for it with everything else. I guess what I’m trying to say is… I love you Lori. _We_ love you. And we wouldn’t trade you for the world.

For a moment, she’s stunned by the sheer positivity that’s been granted to her. The roller coaster of emotions has all led up to this, a moment she didn’t know she really needed until now.

No, not the kind words. They were great, and she’d appreciate them forever. What really makes her happy in this moment is knowing that, in Loud house fashion, the eleven of them will do what they do best.

A big, wholesome group hug. And they put everything they have into it. More tears are shed, more smiles curve on their faces. It could be the last time they hug like this forever, or only for today. But either way, they’ll give it their all. Not just for the love of Lori, but for the love of their whole family.

It warms Bobby and Clyde’s hearts seeing the display, and while they can feel their eyes watering a little bit… it’s nothing compared to what Lynn Sr does.

The poor guy bursts into tears, sobbing hysterically until his wife (while rolling her eyes) coddles him in her embrace.

“I love you guys,” Lori is sure to tell her brother and sisters one last time, and they all promptly tell her that they love her too before everyone breaks off to let her be free to fly.

She takes a deep breath, and smiles at each of them once more before approaching her parents.

The grown ass man bawling his eyes out gets an elbow to his ribs from his wife, shooting him back up to reality. He clears his throat and tries to regain composure, uttering “Okay,” before looking to his daughter with a straight face.

Of course, they all exchange smiles before she speaks up.

“Thank you guys so much. I literally couldn’t ask for a better mom and dad,” she tells them.

“We love you so much, Lori. I’m so proud of you,” Rita warmly expresses to her.

Lynn Sr clears his throat once more before bucking up. “Just- jsut be careful in the city. And call us when you get there. Remember to check the thermostat when you get to the apartment. The electric bill won’t be cheap. And tell Bobby to speak to someone about installing window locks. I know you don’t think it’s a big deal now, even if you live on the fifth floor, but trust me when I say-”

“Dad,” Lori simply says with a little grin to cut him off.

He grins too with the realization that she’s smart enough to know these things. “Right… I love you kiddo. Drive safe.”

Without another word, Lori wraps the two of them into a great big hug, and they’re sure to return the gesture with tight, loving squeezes of their own.

It would seem all the hugging, crying, and kissing has been done as she breaks away from them, but to Clyde’s surprise, she actually turns to give him her attention. A year ago, he probably would have had a breakdown. Now? He just stands there with great anticipation over what she’ll have to say, good or bad.

Any doubts he had about her farewell to him are swiftly subjugated as she puts on that endearing smile of hers though. “Thanks for always being there, Clyde. You really are a great guy, and a great friend.”

He smiles back to her, feeling his cheeks burn a little with some embarrassment. The good kind, though.

“Thanks Lori. You too.”

She gently, cooly rubs his head with one motion before walking away from him. It’s crazy for him to think that he can look at her so differently compared to the way he used to, putting aside childish fantasies of infatuation for a platonic respect she rightfully deserves.

He watches as she offers quick little goodbye waves to her younger siblings who are eager to keep this moment alive, steadily making her way over to her boyfriend to take his hand and look into his eyes.

This would have killed him once upon a time, maybe even literally- as Lori loved to say. But now, he feels strangely happy for them. He’s glad they have the love they share. Not just for Lori, but for him too.

And, in the comfort of his own safe mind… he wonders if he can have that too someday. Maybe even with the auburn haired girl he can’t help but look to now.

This wasn’t supposed to be on his mind, and he certainly doesn’t expect Lynn to think of anything besides her sister’s departure. But sooner or later, he’d let himself be happy to feel this way.

Sooner comes pretty darn soon as she looks back to him, offering a smile seemingly made just for him.

He almost wants to look away and pretend it isn’t as it seems, but seeing how sweetly her eyes gaze back to him, he can’t deny her. He has to smile back.

Finally, the quintessential moment comes. Lori looks to her home one more time, staring intently at it as waves of nostalgia, pride, love, and happiness warm her whole body with just the sight of it.

“Babe… You ready?” she hears Bobby ask her.

She stares at the house for just a moment longer, hoping to hang on as much as possible with just a few more seconds. But soon enough, she decides that the past is in the past, and it’s time to move forward.

Like the man she holds hands with, or the kids she calls her family, or the golden red summer sky glowing all around them, or the handprints painted on the side of the house… the future looks really great.

So, she takes a deep breath, and meets his eyes. “I’m ready.”

An indescribable contentedness cascades inside of Clyde McBride as he watches along with the other Louds smiling and waving goodbye at the woman making her way into the passenger seat of the U-Haul. He sees Bobby waving at them all, him included. He sees Lori doing the same. He hears the engine start and sees the tail lights flicker on, and eventually, the truck moves forward until its but a speck in the distance.

Before he can even come to terms with it, they’re gone. Lori and Bobby finally get to go have their happily ever after, and in the most fantastic way possible, it would seem that the Louds are all at peace, even happy with it. They got all the tears out, they said everything that they needed to say.

So now they idle there for a little while longer, just watching and waiting as the sun continues setting down on the summer evening. Maybe Lori forgot something? Maybe she’d have just a few more things to say, or maybe she’d try one more time to see if Lana would let her take Cliff with them.

But they don’t turn around. No, it finally settles in for everyone that she won’t be coming back, at least not for tonight.

And yet, there isn’t so much sadness with that. If anything, there’s some sort of serene tranquility that comes with knowing tonight will be a night for rest. Not just rest and relaxation, but a gradual transition into the rest of their lives; lives where Leni will be the oldest sister in the house, at least until next year.

But they have plenty of time for those things. For now, Rita Loud has other things in mind.

“Alright everyone, today was a pretty draining day. How about we all go inside and have some ice cream. Does that sound good?”

“Can I have some of your special double chocolate cake?” Lana shamelessly asks with just a little bit of a pout.

And while any other day would see the woman shut her down immediately, she can’t say no to that face tonight. So she smiles at her husband before looking to her daughter.

“Sure. But only if you share with everyone else,” she answers.

They all let out a little cheer as Lynn Sr opens the door, making an entering gesture with his hand. “Come on kids, you better hurry inside. You wouldn’t want your ice cream to get cold, now would ya?” he jokes.

Luan laughs, but the others just kind of shake their heads, just happy he tried.

“Oh, that never gets old,” he comments as he leads the way in.

The Louds all file in behind him, but Clyde stands still for a moment. When Mrs. Loud said ‘everyone,’ did she really mean _everyone?_

His skepticism is soon snuffed as Lincoln and Lynn stop at the doorway, both looking back to check on him.

“Uh, you coming, Clyde?” Lincoln asks.

The other boy perks up upon hearing this, fixing his posture and readying himself to go inside and have himself some well deserved cake and ice cream. “Huh? Oh, sure!”

He begins walking his way in…

“Uhm, actually, do you got a sec Clyde?” Lynn stops him with a beseeching tone in her voice. “There’s something I’d like to talk to you about.”

The halves of Clincoln McCloud both look to one another with inquisitive expressions before Lincoln shrugs, almost as if to tell him he’s fine with it.

And while that comforts Clyde seeing his best friend approve of taking time for just his sister for a little while, he also can’t help but feel a wave of nervousness seep into his veins. What on earth could she possibly want to discuss? Was it something simple like baseball or cutting sugar out of one’s diet? Or did it have something to do with the way she looked back to him just minutes ago?...

Of course, there’s only one way to find out. And maybe it’s just something about the weather, or the way things were just playing out like fairy tales in some sort of Cinderella story this evening… but Clyde decides to do what Lynn would do.

Find his biggest set of balls, and play to win.

“Alright, I guess dessert can wait,” he casually says.

Lynn softly smiles at that before turning to face Lincoln, almost scolding him with her eyes in a way to get him to go inside faster.

He doesn’t argue, he just rolls his eyes and makes his way in. “I’ll try to save you guys some cake.”

…leaving Clyde and Lynn alone on the front porch.

For a few painstaking moments, the two of them stand silently as a warm gust of wind blows by. It’s a reminder that, despite the events of the day, there’s still so much to feel good about. Beautiful weather, a night that’s still young…

Lynn Loud bashfully sticking her hands in her pockets as she looks to the hardwood on the ground…

It’s enough to make Clyde’s heart pitter and patter just a tick faster. But it’s unlike anything he’s ever felt before. This isn’t like talking with Dr. Lopez or the school principal, over even Lori. He’s anxious, sure. But not in a way that makes him want to simply stop or find something new. No, deep down, there’s some sort of confidence with the circumstances.

He _wants_ to talk to her.

“So…” he begins, nervously rubbing the back of his neck with his hand that Lynn once called smooth.

And she doesn’t respond right away. For a little bit, she just keeps gazing at the floor beneath her feet, kind of like she did back in the bedroom with her bedsheets, before finally inhaling and exhaling deeply and facing the boy in front of her.

“Okay, well, uh, I just wanted to start by saying sorry if I laid it on too thick back in my room. I was just… It’s been an emotional day.”

He softly nods. “You’re fine. I understand,” he calmly responds, ignoring his own inner windstorm.

She cocks a little halfsmile as she takes a few steps forward. “Playing it cool now?” she teasingly asks as she comes to his side, standing a comfortable distance away from him.

He can feel his heart race a little faster as he catches her scent. He can almost feel the warmth radiating from her this close, but yeah. Yeah, he’s gonna play it cool for once.

“Sure,” he simply says in response, not really even thinking about it.

She just sort of chuckles at that before getting quiet again. Her thoughtfulness gets the better of her for a few seconds before she puts aside the playful facade to say what she had planned.

“So, uhm… I wanna ask you something okay? And I don’t want you to like… sugarcoat your answer. Just tell me the truth… please,” she tells him.

Well, it would appear things might be getting serious again. And with that, Clyde’s heart beats even faster, making him just a little weak in the legs. But it’s okay. Whatever it is that Lynn has to ask, he’ll do his best to put her mind at ease. It’s the least he can do for her, after all.

“Okay. I promise I will,” he assures her, making an effort to look at her and let her know he’s truly listening.

She glances back at him for just a moment before taking another breath and trying to prepare herself for continuing forward.

“Well… Actually, you never really answered my question. Back before my mom came and got us.”

He thinks back to that moment. With the way things happened, he isn't so sure he can remember it clearly.

“Oh, uhm, I didn’t?” he simply offers her.

She just shakes her head a little bit. “No, but it’s okay,” she softly says to him, meeting him with timid eyes. “You can answer it now though.”

He tries to think hard back to their discussion, the one that has him feeling this great to begin with. She asked him about coming to her, he remembers that much. But did he really give her a sufficient answer? Did he say too little, too much?

Seeing the way she looks at him now with an almost forlorn longing, he isn't so sure.

“I don’t really remember the question, to be honest.”

He can see her wince a little, almost like she hoped to hear anything else. Dang it, seconds into this conversation, and he's already got her cringing. Why couldn't he just say the right things to people? Why couldn't he just be the support she needs and deserves?

It's discouraging, sure. But he won't go down so easily. Not for Lynn, the girl who fights harder than anyone he's ever known. He'll do anything it takes to figure out just what's going on right here. What's going on between them...

“I uh, well… I asked why you came and checked up on me,” Lynn elaborates, staring at him now with a seldom seen somberness.

Something was surely bothering her about it, and it could be really bad. Clyde knows this.

But those eyes… the way they look back to him…

Could it be something like what he's feeling inside?

“Oh yeah. Uh, I think I told you I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” he almost timidly tells her.

She retains the same somber expression, like every answer he has for her just lets her down even more. Dang it, what's he got to do to show her he can do more?

“Yeah but- _why?_ Why would you do that for… me?”

This might be his chance. She was giving him the perfect window, whether she realizes it or not, to let him open up the gates.

And he will. He gladly will. But he wants to be sure it will be okay.

“I don’t understand what you mean by that.”

Lynn looks at him with an almost disbelieved frown. Like maybe she was hoping just to hear something concrete finally.

“Clyde, dude. Did you come up and check on me because you felt like you _had_ to? Or was it like… you know…”

There is it. That’s what he needed to hear.

He knows what she means, what she’s asking. Her shaky voice and glossy eyes say it all.

And for once in his life, Clyde decides to not overthink things. To just say what comes to his mind from his heart. Maybe for better, maybe for worse.

And like so many other things he’s had to watch, do, and say on this day, he knows it won’t be easy. He knows he’ll have to fight feelings of anxiety and possibly rejection very soon.

But for Lynn? It’s worth it. _She_ is worth it.

“Well, Lynn… If I’m being completely honest… Yeah. I went and checked on you because I felt like it was just the right thing to do,” he tells her, earning him more deflation from the resident jock. “But… well… If I’m really being honest here, I’m really glad we talked.”

That gets her to perk up a little. She just watches him with nothing but attentiveness as he takes a deep breath to steady his nerves, and he presses forward with his explanation.

“I think you’re really great Lynn. I mean, I always have. But- I don’t know. Something about talking to you today just made me realize how great I think you really are.”

“How great you think I really am?”

“Yeah. I think you’re awesome. Not just for the sports, or the way you make your subs… But, as a person, I can’t think of anyone quite like you. I can’t think of anyone who uh…”

He stops for a moment, experiencing another one of those seemingly frozen moments where a weighty decision could impact the rest of his life. Maybe not, but maybe _so._ This is his best friend’s sister, first of all. And then there’s the fact that, well, he’s never had… a girlfriend…

The prospect of trying to challenge the way things are, which are already pretty great, by coming forward and revealing his true feelings for her makes him afraid. Terrified to the point where under any other circumstances, he would probably just turn and walk away.

But then he loses himself gazing into her eyes again. In them, there’s this mirthful wonder that makes him realize just why he feels this way to begin with. In them, he considers the idea of them becoming closer, playing more sports together, holding hands, sharing heart to hearts… kissing…

In them, he sees a girl worth taking all the chances for.

And that actually makes this easier.

“I can’t think of anyone else who could make me feel this way.”

Welp, there it is. He’s said the first thing that could be considered a pass at the girl. Would she see it that way? Would she realize just what he meant? And if she didn’t, what now?

More importantly, if she _did,_ what now?

He just grits his teeth and clenches his fists as he tries to keep from trembling. If ever he felt more nervous and desperate to see someone speak, he wouldn’t be able to remember with the endorphin rush he feels within himself and his mind.

As for Lynn… It’s almost like an air has been taken out of her as he watches her lips quiver into just the faintest smile. What the heck could she be thinking?

For a little while longer, he can’t be sure. It isn’t until her smile unashamedly grows cheekier and cheekier that he begins to notice just what’s going on.

And it’s taken a step even further as she raises her hand, placing it against his burning hot cheek.

“Oh Clyde…”

And for what seems like just the _perfect_ amount of time, they just stare into each other’s eyes. No more words are spoken, no more moves are made. They just share this mutual, compassionate gaze, letting whatever things they could be and are feeling respectively brew inside of them.

For Clyde, his heart is beating the fastest and hardest it has since his last (also very first) trip to the gym. But it doesn’t make him feel sick or scared. No. This time, he has such a rush of pleasant sensations simmering in his veins that he wonders whether or not he’s just always supposed to feel this way.

It gives him the confidence to smile back, and to even take this a step further.

He slowly inches his hand towards hers, taking it and holding it as she keeps it firmly resolved on his cheek.

She doesn’t fight it. If anything, it makes her smile grow just a little more as they refuse to move their eyes from one another.

And in this game they play, she makes the next move. She carefully removes her hand from his cheek, smoothly transitioning it into his hand, letting them both fall together so they can just take comfort in holding each other this way.

And there’s no time to overthink it for Clyde. He just accepts her gesture, feeling the happiest he’s maybe ever felt in knowing that she doesn’t want to push him away or maybe even lock him into a cobra clutch.

 For whatever reason, be it lack of experience with such things, or maybe just the exertion of a crazy day getting to his head, he can’t think of much else to say besides the following.

“You wanna sit by me when we have dessert?”

He feels a little like an idiot when she sweetly giggles at his request, but not enough to let it ruin his mood, especially when she fixes her smile proudly, still fixing her eyes on his.

“Only if you promise not to make a big deal out of this…” she says.

“Make a big deal out of what?”  he questions.

Before he even knows it, she’s answering his question by planting a soft kiss on his lips. A quick, smooth little peck. Nothing elaborate or complicated.

But boy oh boy does it put him on cloud nine. When today started, he had no idea he would get his first kiss from a girl! Let alone Lynn of all people!

As he convalesces, his blurry vision recovers back to normal, and once again, the image of the beautiful, smiling Lynn Loud is all that he sees.

Well, now it seems like more of a smirk as she considerately moves her hand away from his.

“Alright, tiger. Pep talk’s over. Let’s get back to the game.”

And just like that, she’s turning around, making her way back into the Loud house. She offers him a quick glance back to let him know her kiss was genuine, and that they were far from finished in this regard.

But then she’s disappeared into the home, just like Lori taking off into the sunset with her beloved Boo Boo Bear.

Luckily, all he has to do is go inside and he’ll see her again. It’s that easy. And with that thought, he realizes something.

A lot of these milestones really aren’t so crazy after all. First kisses, leaving your parents’ house… Sure, they mean a lot. They mean the world. And the memories will last forever.

But these tasks don’t have to be daunting. They’re meant to be moments that lead to better futures, futures where people can learn and grow together, whether they’re miles away, or a few footsteps into a kitchen serving cake and ice cream.

When one door closes, another one opens they say.

And for Clyde McBride and Lynn Loud Jr, love is an open door.

THE END

 


End file.
